I didn't want to do a normal cast ranking for two reasons. One, you fucks are all doing them, and two, there'd be a fuckload of comments like "OMG I can't believe Kourtney is out!" and "If Matt's not first out I'm not following!"
So I'm gonna rank the 18 cast members in terms of their value as casting choices: for the mentally not-up-there-with-me, that means ranking them on what they brought to the table to help make a good Survivor.
STAY TUNE MUTHAFUCKAS!