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StatelyWayneManor wrote:

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Ghost Rider looked good in the promos, too.
Lesson learned.

I love Matt. Seattle is my master now.

no it didn't.

Americas OT Player wrote:

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I was one of the lucky ones to see a sneak screening of this movie tonight, and trust me - it's worth all the hype and viral marketing. I wrote it very fast when I got home tonight so there might be a few spelling errors, so forgive me. I've put my review in spoiler tags in case anyone wants to wait until the 18th to be surprised.

But if you don't care and want to know what Cloverfield is about, then go ahead and read it.

Alright then, let's get to it.

Spoiler [+]

The movie starts out with a handheld camera being turned on at a going away party for Rob who just got a job at Slusho in Japan. We learn during the party that Hawk is our resident cameraman and Beth is Rob's ex-girlfriend but she still cares deeply for Rob and confides in Lil that she doesn't want him to go and that they still can have a chance together. They cram some basic human drama within the first 7 minutes of the party scene like you're watching one of those brat pack films from the 80's.

The party looks pretty convincing since all of the actors aren't famous stars, and the club set looks like a real place that you'd see and visit in New York on a Friday night. The party doesn't last too long when something like an earthquake hits and the lights go out then come back on dimly. Everyone basically just looks at each other like what the fuck just happened, then another more powerful quake hits and then panic starts to set in. They turn on the TV to see the news and so far it's being reported as some type of earthquake that hit lower Manhattan, then the power goes out again. Some people go outside, and Rob and a bunch of his friends go up to the roof to get a better look to see if there's any damage. Car alarms are going off everywhere as they look around over the roof into the street below.

Rob starts talking to Hawk who's filming him, then they see an explosion coming from what looks like the Empire State building. The top is blown off and huge chunks of the Empire State are flying everywhere like meteors hitting various buildings and in the street. They all panic and start running down the stairs and the another quake hits and the lights go out permanently. They make their way out the club front door in the dark. They're all now in the street and people are running around in different directions, but they just stand there confused looking at each other while Hawk films the whole thing. That famous scene from the preview happens not long after when the head of the Statue of Liberty comes racing through the sky and hits right near wher they were standing. They all start to run together down the street and Hudd figures that the subway is the safest place to be in case terrorists are attacking New York with weapons of mass destruction. No one knows what the hell is going on.

They all head down into the subway and you see a bunch of people running on the tracks trying to go uptown and away from what they think is a terrorist attack in lower Manhattan. No trains are running for some reason. They decide not to get caught inside the train tunnel with a mob in case it collapses, so they sit on a bench and wait nervously, talk to each other and weight their options for getting uptown where they think it's safe. Some guy goes running by them in the subway and he looks injured and yelling that "they're falling off everywhere in the East Village and the South Street seaport." They don't know what he means by this but later on in the movie they will.

They decide that their best chances to get uptown is to walk on the side streets towards 11th avenue and make their way to the Henry Hudson and straight up. Along the way they get sidetracked when more explosions happen. This time it's military jets flying overhead along with helicopters and they're shooting missiles. They all run into a store and duck for cover behind grocery shelves. Then like 9/11 you can see a cloud of smoke making its way past the windows of the store in the darkness (the street lights give the smoke cloud an eerie feel) and suddenly the windows implode. Lil is hit with shards of glass in her shoulder and legs. They grab a bunch of medical gauze pads and take care of her wounds before they leave the store. The streets are dark because the street lights are all blown out. They go another way instead of 11th Avenue because they can't see anything. They make their way up near mid-town and encounter the military fighting the enemy. Some guy runs past them screaming "it's alive and it's huge!" Hawk is still filming all of this as they meet a military dude. They ask what the fuck is happening? Are we being attacked by terrorists? The military dude (whose face is pixelated out for some reason, but you sort of understand why at the end) and he's says it's not terrorists. They were expecting this (meaning the military) since earlier this morning and they were getting positioned throughout the city before it came on shore. They ask him what it is and he's says they don't know what the fuck it is, but right now it's winning. Fighting erupts in the street and the military dude runs off with other soldiers shooting their rifles and leaves the friends there. This is where they (and the audience) catches the first glimpse of the monster as you see it very quickly turning and heading down a street as jets fly overhead shooting missiles. The monster isn't very defined early on, but you sort of know that his size is fucking massive when you see him next to the building before he disappears from view.

They walk some more and finally wind up near central Park. They see that the monster isn't just hitting lower Manhattan, he's already hit mid-town and 60th street is torn to pieces with huge gashes and missing sections in hotels and office buildings. Rob asks Hawk to keep filming as long as possible because people need to see this since it's history happening right now. They see a horse and carriage slowly passing by and the driver is hanging dead on the side of the carriage and being dragged along by the horse. They also see these crab-like things dead in the street along with dead bodies, some of which look chewed or bitten up along with others who were killed by falling debris.

One of the crab things (which is the size of a SUV) is still alive and bites Lil's injured leg. Hud grabs her and picks up as Beth screams and Rob yells and they start to run but are stopped by another military unit who seem to be rounding up survivors and bringing them to the Jacob Javitz Convention Center which is now a military base of operations. The doctor's take Lil to treat her while the others are put in a hallway with a bunch of rooms full of survivors waiting. They're watching one of many monitors with TV news from all around the world broadcasting on the disaster. Ocean drilling platforms across the Atlantic being destroyed by the monster and then they show recently sent in clips of a destroyed New York City. Boats in the harbor are in flames and sinking. They show exclusive video footage taken by a Japanese tourist in New York of the Brooklyn Bridge being ripped to shreds by a giant claw (this clip is funny because it's like an inside Godzilla joke), and you finally get to see an aerial view of the Statue of Liberty with a stump where her head used to be with claw marks.

The camera then cuts to sounds of a woman screaming in a makeshift M.A.S.H unit in a room near Rob, Beth, Hawk and Hudd. They run over and see a shadow of a woman being held up by military dudes and she's expanding like she's filled with gas. It's their friend Lil. The doctor's are yelling that it's something to do with the crab-like creatures that are really lice that are living on the surface of the monster and falling off all over Manhattan. You sort of get the meaning that when they bite people they do something very bad to them internally like parasites that infect with other parasites or something. One military police officer sees Hawk filming this and tries to stop him by grabbing the camera. The film goes dark, and now cuts to Beth and the others all dirty and running away from the Javitz Center because it's been destroyed by the monster. Hawk is dead and now Rob has the camera and is filming. They also have a few helicopter pilots with them and they all go to another military area where they load them on helicopters. Rob grabs Beth and they get on one helicopter but there's no room for Hudd so he gets on the other one. They all take off in the night sky but a loud roar is heard. Suddenly the helicopter jerks back and forth and the camera films outside of the window and you what looks like claws, and then you can see the ground coming up real quick as they hit it and crash. The camera goes black. It then goes back on and it's on its side on the ground next to Rob. He's alive but just waking up. There's smoking, flaming wreckage all around. He gets up while the camera just lays there, filming, and we see him run over to more wreckage and he finds Beth alive. He grabs her arm and they limp off, but he turns around and you see him come back for the camera and he picks it up and they make their way to some sort of stone tunnel underpass in Central Park.

They both sit down underneath the cover of the tunnel but they can still hear destruction from each open end. Beth is quiet and looks like she's in severe shock. Rob puts the camera on himself and he talks to whatever future audience that may see this tape and tells them the enormity of this historic event and that it needs to be preserved. He checks Beth again and then looks at the camera lens and he seems very tired, so turns the camera off. The camera goes dark, but then comes back on and it's now morning. Rob tries to wake up Beth but she's either in a very deep sleep or she's dead (you really don't know or find out because the last scene is a loud roar and Rob runs out of the tunnel into open ground and points the handheld camera up and you finally get to see the monster. He's so big that his head is partially covered in what looks like fog or a cloud all the way up in the sky. The battery in the camera begins to signal that it's dying and Rob starts talking to us as he films the monster that's almost standing right over him. From the viewpoint of the camera you can see the length of the monster which has a thick body and six arms with claws and what looks like a whale-shaped head that you can make out from under its chin. From the way Rob pans the camera you can see hundreds or thousands of those crab lice creatures under the belly and sides of the monster dropping off on the ground. The monsters head tilts downward and it almost looks like it's staring down at Rob. You start to see this massive, scary as fuck head with tiny eyes in each side and a huge open mouth move downward. It starts to come down closer and closer to the ground where Rob is filming, then the battery goes completely dead and you're left feeling like you just saw the end of The Soprano's, not knowing whether Rob or Beth live or die.

Then a black screen comes up and explains that this film was found by the military after the attack, given some sort of code named "Cloverfield" and archived for future review in case the monster comes back (which leaves the viewer to assume that they never killed the monster and he just went back somewhere into the sea) and if he returns they need to be prepared.

Notes about The monster.

Ok, this sucker is fucking huge when you finally get to see him at the end. That's not to say you don't get to see parts of him during the course of the movie. You see his shoulder, neck and backside when he's stomping around between buildings. You see his claw come up and destroy a bridge, and you see other body parts almost near the end when he brings the helicopters down. Unfortunately, this all happens very quickly and if you blink for a second you'll miss them and be tempted to stay in the theater and watch it again just to see what you missed.

damn, you beat me to it. oh well. :-)