Dear Alexis: So much has happened to me lately that I don't know where to begin. My mom recently shot my dad, and then killed herself. My dad
survived but he his having a rough time. I was then sent to a foster home in Myanmar a few weeks ago, and if you've been reading the news, you can
probably tell that that hasn't being going too well. So basically, I have no parents and no home and hardly any food to eat. No clean water. No place to
sleep. Nothing. Worst off, I have juvenile diabetes (without my medications) and am only a 6 year old girl. Me and the other people here may not survive.
Help me. What can you do for me?!
This is ridiculous. You need to GROW UP and be a strong independent young woman and stop making so many excuses!! I can't believe you just gave me all
those pity lines. The only thing "juvenile" about your juvenile diabetes is your attitude!! You need to start thinking positive!! Don't you
have goals? You should look into joining some after school activities to broaden your perspective on life. You need to become more well-rounded. Start
getting those grades up too!! That whole "I got sent a foster home at age 6" line isn't gonna fly on that application to a Top 25 University in
the United States. So step up to the plate and get with the program!!
You can do it! sMiLe!!!! YAY
- Survivor Sucks
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- In Memory, 9/11/01
*** Other Advice Given By Alexis (and Weekly Quotes) ***
| Started By | Comment | ||
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 MyChemicalShowmance |
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Posts: 476 (05/16/08 12:45 PM) |
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LaurenTheLush |
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Posts: 1174 (05/16/08 12:54 PM) |
MyChemicalShowmance wrote: I think I just peed my panties. |
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platinumtlc |
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Posts: 2971 (05/16/08 1:05 PM) Registered User |
LOL
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Jenny du Jour |
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Posts: 1052 (05/16/08 1:07 PM) |
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platinumtlc |
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Posts: 2972 (05/16/08 1:08 PM) Registered User |
Dear Alexis, I have this horrible problem that has been going on a quite a while now. It can severely affect my life and future, and everyone around
me. I've been keeping it inside for quite a while now and I'm so lost and confused! I feel like I'm going to do something I'll regret for the
rest of my life! I feel the need to hurt people I would have never thought to hurt before! I don't know what do to or who to talk to! I'm about to
break! HELP ME PLEASE! Love, AK
Hey Gurl, don't worry. I see that your subscription ends today, so all you have to do is renew your subscription for another year or so and we'll work hard to solve your problem. Also, renewing for 2 years gives you a 5% discount off of the total amount of tax applied to your order. I know you can be that girl!
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NlGHTCRAWLER |
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Posts: 15765 (05/16/08 1:51 PM) >: | |
Dear Alexis: I am 10 years old. My name is Brenda. The other night, my uncle, Jason, came over and wanted to play with my
Nintendo Wii. While we were playing Mario Kart, he stuck his hands down my pants and.....well, did things. I didn't like it. He told me that if I told
anyone, he would kill me. I'm so confused. I feel like I've done something wrong. I feel dirty. I want to die. Can you help me please?
Brenda! Hey girlfriend! First off, you need to change your name. What are you, 70? No one is named Brenda! May I suggest that you change it to something beautiful like Alexis 2? So anyway, about your problem - you've nothing to worry about! When you're older, you'll have to let LOTS of men touch you in many places - especially where you pee. See, this is how women get popular. How do you think I got on Survivor and became the star of Micronesia in the first place? Don't think of it as something dirty.....just consider it practice!!! Good luck, Bren........er, Alexis 2!
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GeneOkerlund27 |
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Posts: 3333 (05/16/08 2:02 PM) kthxsubnic |
plol
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Jenny du Jour |
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Posts: 1054 (05/16/08 2:04 PM) |
What is plol? pity lol?
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Gregoire |
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Posts: 27679 (05/16/08 2:17 PM) Registered user |
Dear Alexis: I'm bleeding down there! I don't know what to do. I'm scared. Am I broken? Cindy,
13 years old
Hey-ho, Cindy gurl! Bleeding 'down there' is a sign that God doesn't love you. Just do what I do and shove a tube
sock all up in dere. On Survivor we girls had to use leaves and the bodies of dead bats. Girl's gotta do what she gotta do! But you should stop
complaining. Some women don't bleed down there anymore, like that big fat black woman from the show. Some women, like Natalie, don't even have vaginas!
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NlGHTCRAWLER |
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Posts: 15766 (05/16/08 2:17 PM) >: | |
Wait - what's alol? Actual lol?
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yosimtesam |
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Posts: 201 (05/16/08 2:42 PM) |
Dear Alexis: I am really concerned about a lie that i told and want to come clean with the truth, but feel i will be in
trouble if i do. What should i do? Mike, 15 years old.
Hey Mike! Its nothing to worry about. Just do what i do; when you tell a lie, go into a state of denial so in "your own little reality" you never did lie. You see by going into a state of denial, you are now perfect and better than everyone else, except me of course. 
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SGD |
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Posts: 4 (05/16/08 2:57 PM) |
about the boy and pants!! |
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NlGHTCRAWLER |
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Posts: 15767 (05/16/08 3:09 PM) >: | |
Also:
LMFAO!!! |
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redwing85 |
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Posts: 39 (05/16/08 4:33 PM) |
Dear Alexis, my name is Melissa, I am a 12 year old girl and I am worried about gaining weight. My friends told me I should make myself throw up
after every meal by sticking my fingers down my throat. Is this a healthy way to stay thin?
Hi Melissa! Being thin and beautiful is of the one of the most important things a girl can do. In my premium section, I have lots of tips on how you can become super
beautiful and successful like me. The per day cost is less than a Starbucks venti chocolate creme frappuccino, and less calories too! Join now! You simply
cannot find this type of information and advise anywhere else! We accept all major credit cards, most moms keep their credit card in their purse.
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Paris Hilton |
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Posts: 2341 (05/16/08 4:41 PM) |
Dear Alexis, my mom and dad are getting a divorce. Sometimes I feel like it is my fault. What should I do? - Stacy, 14
Hey Stacy! Divorce is a common thing in households! Dont worry for one second. It's not your fault. It's the condom's fault. If it had worked properly, your parents would still be happily married. And probably rich too!
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Paris Hilton |
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Posts: 2342 (05/16/08 4:45 PM) |
Dear Alexis, I am seriously considering committing suicide! I dont have the will to live anymore. I think I might try it tonight... I dont feel anyone
cares enough about me. - Sarah, 15
Sarah, For my advice, please upgrade to Premium Membership.
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 3205 (05/16/08 4:51 PM) Registered User |
LaurenTheLush wrote: OMG!!! This one actually made me laugh out loud!!!
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NlGHTCRAWLER |
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Posts: 15769 (05/16/08 5:30 PM) >: | |
Dear Alexis: My name is Oowatanite. I'm very horny for you. If I upgrade to your premium section, will you date me?
PLEASE!!!!
Sure! I'm used to charging guys for dates! Yay!!!!
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NlGHTCRAWLER |
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Posts: 15775 (05/16/08 6:47 PM) >: | |
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beatles20147 |
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Posts: 11570 (05/16/08 8:29 PM) Registered User |
Dear Alexis,
My parents caught my brother "Jim" having sex with a pie. Now whenever I see him I can't get that awkward image out of my head. What should I do?
This question is obviously a prank. I've seen that movie. Please show some courtesy and stop sending these joke questions, which waste my time and prevent me from helping out the girls who really need it. Dear Alexis, I haven't had my period in a while and I think I might be pregnant. I'm embarrassed to tell my parents but I know I can't hide this from them. What should I do?
This question is obviously a prank. I've seen that movie. Please show some courtesy and stop sending these joke questions, which waste my time and prevent me from helping out the girls who really need it. |
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- Survivor Sucks
- Lions, Tigers, Survivors - Oh My!
- Survivor Spoilers
- MESS Hall Tribal Council
- MESS Hall Archive
- Survivor Speculation
- Survivor 20+
- The Amazing Race
- Big Brother
- Big Brother - PAST SEASONS
- The Apprentice
- American Idol
- American Idol PAST SEASONS
- The Mole
- Lost
- Other Shows That Suck
- Off Topic
- Clubs That Suck. No, Really.
- The Dump
- Monster Island
- Purgatory
- FAQ
- In Memory, 9/11/01
