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I've been waiting for this thread for a while now, but I never truly expected it so soon. I was giving them at least another year.

Angie's been posting tidbits of distress (and often much more than that) for a long time. Angie doesn't know it, but I think of her situation often. I am not sure why -- I guess I just felt sorry for her, having been down a similar path, albeit minus the rug-rats and my "wife" being a hairy ex-Navy bear.

No ONE person's experience or opinion is going to provide a solution for her, but she can certainly get some insight into what she may expect.

In my own "divorce," we both felt similarly: we loved each other as friends, but nothing more. Though difficult at first, it resulted in the most liberating and affirming decision we could make. With the weight of pretense off our shoulders, life improved quickly once we made the break.

At the very least, Angie and hubby want to do right by the kids, and seem to have already agreed on being amiable in the future. That's a mature and intelligent approach.

It's clear that Angela is an extremely sexual person. Can't imagine them continuing to live together in any fashion unless Angela is ready to give up her sex life entirely. The open marriage bargain works on paper but tends to fall apart in real life, and logistical matters get in the way: motel bills can pile up quickly and the resultant credit card receipts are often a slap in the face to the other party!

Divorce is a HUGE, life-altering experience. Everyone knows this. It's high on the stressometer. But after the initial throes of anguish... it is true in most cases that things improve rapidly.

Is there really such a thing as an amicable divorce?

I got everything, so it worked for me.



Good luck, Angela.

This isn't something that is going to resolve itself soon. You'll be faced with many more long talks and emotional rides. Try to consider it a purge and a process. If you recognize that you MUST deal with it, that it is BEST for all involved to face facts, it may not be as painful as it COULD be.

I'd urge you to seek counseling, together or on your own, but that is a decision only you can make.